TangledWings

Monday Mosaic--the County Fair edition

It always seems like a good idea at the time...the county fair that is.  I love the idea of eating greasy, calorie laden, heart attack causing, sinfully delicious fair food.  I love the idea of making memories with the ones I love.  I love the idea of a photo ops around every corner, surrounding you at every turn.  But it also always seems like we start arguing the minute we pull into the parking lot.  I get mad at T because he's a little bit too frugal for his own good.  T gets made at me for not being frugal enough.  And we both get mad at the B-Dog because he starts whining a mere 10 minutes after our arrival..."It's too hot.  I can't walk anymore.  Somebody needs to carry me.  I just can't make it any further."  Add to that the exorbitant cost of everything which leaves you feeling more than a little bit ripped off...and even more whining ("I need an ice cream.  Somebody please buy me an ice cream."--but who in god's name wants to pay 3 bucks for a simple soft serve cone you can get at McDonald's for under a dollar?), and well you have a pretty emotionally loaded afternoon.  I think at one point I completely lost it when the B-Dog, begging to be carried by someone, anyone, sat down on the pavement and refused to move and I promised him that if he didn't get up he would never eat ice cream again as long as he lived under my roof.  And I think I'm also guilty of swearing that next year when the county fair rolls around again I was leaving both of them at home and going by myself.  But then you get home and later in the day start recalling the moments when you weren't at each others throats and you actually did enjoy yourselves...and almost didn't mind paying an outrageous amount of money just to play a game in which you throw one single measley dart and a wall full of small, somewhat flaccid balloons.  And yes, even though you feel completely sick to your stomach because you haven't inhaled that much grease in one setting in a very, very long time...and your also a little sick at the thought of spending the equivalent of a week's worth of groceries in one afternoon, an afternoon in which you have absolutely nothing to show for it except slightly tighter jeans, you know that next year at this very same time you'll being doing the exact same thing--stuffing your face while arguing with your family members.  Maybe we have a short memory span.  Maybe we're gluttons for punishment.  Maybe we're hopeless romantics who swear this year will be different.  Whatever it is, it keeps us going back year after year after year.    

Celebration

Today I'm celebrating life's changes...come take a look...

We Have Entered a New Era

Yep, we have entered a new era: the field trip era. 

The B-Dog went on his very first field trip today.  Yesterday he was moved into a class of older children which means he is now able to participate in the weekly outings.  When the teacher told me about this change and how wonderful and fantastic it would be I was smiling on the outside but I must admit, on the inside I was in total panic--what if they leave him somewhere? what if they have a wreck? what if he gets lost? what if they forget him in the bus and he dies from the heat?  what if he gets hurt?--all things that tragically have happened to other children and could possibly happen to mine.  All stories that break my mama heart.  And although these very same things are just as likely to happen while he's with me it's different to consider them happening when I'm not there. 

So I had a day and a half to sit with these fears, to mull them over and console myself, and then it was time for the big event.  Of course not before there was a small dilemma about the bus riding aspect of the trip.  When the B-Dog found out he would be riding a bus to the park he insisted he was not going to ride it, he would just walk.  T took him to school a little early so they could check out the vehicle and get the B-Dog familiarized with it before they loaded up in it later in the day.  I thought this might reduce the likelihood that he would plant his feet into the ground and refuse to budge therefore being left behind with a younger class. 

As is usually the case the day was a huge hit with absolutely no problems whatsoever.  When I arrived to pick the B-Dog up at the end of the day he greeted me with wide eyes and a huge smile...and of course he relayed the entire day's events, every last detail, on the car ride home.  But mama's worry.  We can't help it.  That's just what we do.  The first time our child experiences something new, even if it is fun and fantastic, is a little nerve wracking.  All change, even good change, is a little frightening.  All the what ifs enter your mind and although you know more than likely everything will turn out just fine and this is simply a part of the way life is always growing and changing you can't help but realize there is a slim possibility that the worst might happen.  So you sit in it...for at least a day and a half...and then you let go of it...and you smile...and you walk into the new era as bravely as you can...and later you sigh and wonder why you were so freaked out to begin with.

*sigh*

...I just love those big brown eyes..