If you have been following all my stories about ArtFest then you read about the mini meltdown I had during the first workshop. It was a truly intense moment for me. But at the end of the workshop I sat in a room full of budding poets and words dripping with soulful truth and felt an incredible sense of love, the kind of feeling that leaves one believing in god, or at least in some kind of power greater than the self.
Through most of my ordinary days I don't hold on to that sense of love the way I wish I could. I forget what it feels like to know without a doubt that love indwells me and surrounds me. I manage to forget that I am deeply loved just as I am, right where I am. That is why these moments when I do recognize it are so powerful and significant. They are what pulls me through those moments when feeling that deep unconditional love is nothing more than a memory. When those moments of experiencing what I choose to call divine love occur I try to breathe them in as deeply as possible, pulling them into my body, memorizing the sensations, being fully present in the moment so that it can transform me in little bits and pieces. And then life goes on and the moment slips away. Like the rest of life it is a cycle...the remembering, forgetting, and remembering again.
Most of the time those moments aren't planned or expected. They just happen, slipping up on me and catching me unaware. They always leave me a little teary, a little breathless, and very humble. They are why I believe in god, in myself, in hope, in life's ability to unfold in ways that support me as a worthwhile human being. They are why I believe my journey into knowing myself, embracing myself, and accepting myself is the most important journey I will ever take.
When was the last time you felt that kind of love, the kind of love that is beyond human capabilities? Maybe it started inside of you and then tumbled out. Maybe you sensed it surrounding you and you pulled it within. What were you doing when that moment occurred? How did you honor it? How do you hold it inside and recall the knowledge of that love when life gets really messy? When was the last time you knew without a doubt you are loved in a way that is beyond comprehension and explanation? And when the knowledge of that love sneaks up on you, who are you after it wraps itself tightly around you then silently slips away? I always find that in that moment and the moments afterward I am my truest and best self.
Yes , for me it has been a while to feel the true magnificence of that love dwelling within...thank you for these questions.Today i am remembering i am L.O.V.E
Posted by: Nic Hohn | April 24, 2008 at 04:11 PM
I love this Michelle...
Posted by: Irma | April 24, 2008 at 06:08 AM